Thanks

Mary Schmich wrote about a Zen parable:

A wealthy merchant heard about a school that needed larger quarters, so he went to see the schoolteacher. He offered the teacher a sack of gold. The teacher said he'd take it.

The wealthy man was dissatisfied with the teacher's response. His sack contained a lot of gold, he said. A person could live for a whole year on a fraction of this sum. Even for a rich person, such a large gift was a big deal.

The teacher heard the hint. "Do you want me to thank you for it?" he asked.

"You ought to," said his benefactor.

"Why should I?" asked the teacher. "The giver should be thankful."

It made me think. Recently I had sent someone a gift because his wife had been in an accident. I was surprised that they didn't even acknowledge receipt of the gift...with a 30 second email or something. After reading Schmich's column, I suppose I should be thankful because I was the giver and giving makes me happy.

In real life, though, a simple thank you is not out of line (from the receiver, of course!). I am not talking about thank you note, but a quick email, phone call or even text message should be expected. After all, when you send something, you are not even sure the person received it. When I was in South Africa in June, I sent someone something as a gift and still don't know if she received it. I'd feel rude asking, so I've let it go.

I'm wondering if these people who don't send their thanks are remembering the parable...or if they're just lazy.